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Image  —  Posted: May 8, 2019 in Uncategorized

The Purple Rained

Posted: May 8, 2019 in Uncategorized

I

never

wanted to be

your

weekend lover.

But now I

lay here covered by your

purple rain.

It’s… lukewarm.

Cold enough to freeze my emotions,

Yet hot enough

for you to blaze an impression

over me.

Perhaps,

this was the end to a beginning that,

probably never started.

But I,

still,

laid down my heart,

in this trinity of time.

like you were already

combined in my history.

Memories marked in chronos

but now ancient.

The irony

of it all,

is that you

fed me enough

affirmations

to remind me

that I was beautiful.

And..

after 7 years of

doubtful moments

in someone else’s identity,

the

mural in the mirror is not only misty

but it’s forgotten.

I stood there

long enough

to know that my

personality…

was a corpse in a coffin.

A life

living…

but somehow I,

stopped

living it.

What happened

to that free spirit?

But

you…

you was the blessing

that released me from

captivity.

The purple

rained

slowly

and

drizzled

then got heavy.

Perhaps,

I demanded

something

that was never meant to be.

So,

Thank you

for returning back

to your shadows

and to my obscurities.

I’m finding purpose

as you remain

the absentee

of my atmosphere.

As loud as

your silence

shouted,

that peace within

would clear

the clouds

that clenched

the purple rain…

that once reigned

over me.

And I…

I…

searched the three dimensions

of my soul

and like Job,

pondered with regrets.

So I know…

I know,

It’s definitely easier

to take back words

you never…

felt.

 

Carlene “Spirit” Roberts

April 18, 2018

(LISTEN TO AUDIO HERE)

Love UnKnown

Posted: May 8, 2019 in Uncategorized

Love Unknown

If you felt the love I know, you wouldn’t of hung up that phone.

Where the choice to be alone was decided just over a list of wrongs.

Easily forgiven.

Easily written.

Like pain in poems.

But remember…

the birth of everything is the same.

Reversed.

Cursed.

Naked.

Without blame.

It’s easier to remember the timeline of destruction.

Or promises that never prospered

and grew in the same place.

The love I knew refused to hang up.

My silence filled the space of maturity.

But an anxious energy cannot replicate a birth.

It can only duplicate hurt.

You heard that pain in my voice.

As it echoed the pain in your choice.

And like it was your last push for redemption… you breathed goodbye.

The love I know recognized your laughter under layers of disappointments.

The love I know was…clairvoyant.

Your scars were transparent.

It saw your fear in your stares.

And that’s why your image was strange after each exchange of intimacy.

That’s not of God.

Especially after I found redemption.

You couldn’t recognize your ministry but you still delivered me.

This season was beautiful.

If God claims this as a testimony, then your unknown has healed generations.

And you can say that this love I know reigned like David.

Remember the birth that healed nations.

Reversed.

Cursed.

Naked.

Without blame.

Not every promise is glorious.

The love I know saw victory.

But some stories are built like sandcastles.

Baptized and resurrected.

I lied to myself and still expected reconciliation.

Did my determination hang up first

because the loved I know

was still unknown to me.

And if so… I’m sorry.

 

 

Spirit 07/20/2018

HOW DO YOU DESCRIBE UNDESCRIBABLE FEELINGS?

UNPREDICTABLE TEACHINGS THAT SEND HEALING

WITH ONE TOUCH FROM YOU.

I LOVE YOU … TOO MUCH.

IN SUCH A WAY THAT MY COMMITMENT WILL NEVER STRAY.

YOU BRING CONFIDENCE TO MY DAYS

AND I SEE WHAT BEAUTY REALLY MEANS

WHEN I GAZE AT YOU.

LOVE… IS A MAZE.

LOVE… IS AMAZING,

WHEN YOU THINK OF THE PHASES WE HAVE BEEN THRU.

YOU GREW, I GREW, WE GREW

TO AN UNSPEAKABLE UNITY BASED ON COMMITMENT

AND THE SIMPLE PURITY OF TOGETHERNESS.

EVERYDAY I CONFESS MY APPRECIATION WITH PRAISE

BECOUSE YOUR LOVE LAID A FOUNDATION IN MY LIFE

AND EVERY SHADE OF HAPPINESS

KEEPS ME WANTING YOU…. EVERY DAY AND EVERY NIGHT.

KEEPS ME HOLDING YOU TIGHT.

KEEPS ADVANCING MY EMOTIONS TO GREATER HEIGHTS.

I AM SPEECHLESS… BECAUSE I LOVE YOU

SPIRIT 02/14/05

Whispering Words

Posted: May 8, 2019 in Uncategorized

 

Picture these words as gentle,

Low whispers.

Kissing your fantasies.

Erecting something  

That only passion could explain.

This is not physical.

This is chemistry.

That only lonely hearts could explain.

Because their yearn for affection

Creates the perfect emotion.

Not erotic but sensual.

Feeling these words

May seem unusual

But this makes distance expendable.

Sampling divine energy.

Every one has a story

About true love

But we have faith.

Griots to romantic blessings.

These words,

Whispering Corinthians.

Kissing your spirituality.

Resurrecting something

That only God could explain.

This is not physical

This is divine.  

Your touch is blind

But I can still feel your caress.

Suppress in between

My orgasms and my imagination.

Muscles contracting to grasp the moment.

Masturbating me with your prose.

Bypassing those who told us

That making love required

Us laying on top to each other.

Groping our loins.

Suckling areas only revealed at birth.

Exercising our joints to positions unknown.

Gasping for more stamina

To pull back and fight the rush.  

Trusting that the pain is sensational.

Occasionally looking

In each other eyes for reinforcement.

Shouting vain gestures.

Sometimes faking your pleasures for reassurance

I’d

Rather

Stay

Abstinent.

Loosing the elements of our bond

In premature gratifications,

Is not worth it.  

Nothing is more sacred

Than your written whispers.

Because thinking of you

May make my lips flutter

But your words

Will comfort other areas… forever.      

Xavier’s Poem

Posted: May 8, 2019 in Uncategorized

I know I can’t hang his lifetime on my walls.

With his picture-perfect smile,

I thought I have given birth to my burdens.

I have indulged my pain in his love

and I have indulged my fears in his trust.

So he has given birth to a mother.

Each contraction was for our future.

Pushing us closer to our destinies.

It’s through him I see life.

It’s through God we have life.

I’ve tucked away his answers through our nightly storytelling.

Using his imagination to protect his innocence.

Letting him know that since the beginning of him,

I have changed my burdens… to motivation.

Converted my lusts into a passion for striving.

Indulging in the perfection I hang on my walls.

His smiles fall into my emptiness.

Breaking down the barriers that hold on to my regrets.

Sets me free and allow to be… a mother.

Reminding me of the other smiles that are waiting for us in heaven.

I can’t be condemned if I have given birth to his guardian angles

and I will make sure that the devil will never get a hold of my babies

because I carry the grace of God in my motherhood.

Put his words on grounds where I stood weak.

Repent for forgiveness and ask him

to bless a smile that encourages my lifetime

because the walls are getting too small

for our captured memories and so

I frame Xavier’s perfection so it can

fall freely into my heart.

Share my poetry to exchange our changes.

Use his drawings to shade in forgotten moments.

Glancing at innovative chronicles recorded on our timeline.

His smile turns our bond into memoirs.

Pictured for perfection, I am reminded that

I can’t hang his lifetime on my walls.  

Reflection 111217

Posted: November 12, 2017 in Uncategorized

For me, in my life… especially in these present times, I’m finding that there is freedom and a certain kind of peace in having less. I’ve been guilty, like many of us, of fallen to societies views or value in “upgrading”, “upsizing “, and so forth. While there is nothing wrong with advancement, sometimes, some of these “ups” decreased me in some way…. spiritually , emotionally, financially, physically, socially, and even environmentally. Pastor Scott said today, “Don’t let your blessings get in the way of your obedience”. That statement went to the core of my consciousness today. #GodIsGood

He Ran

Posted: June 24, 2015 in Uncategorized

He ran…
because it existed
within his existence.
From ancestors running
from slave masters.
He ran to Christian spirituals
that sang to hearts like rituals.
To sooth the travels
through the middle passage.
He ran to messages dreamed
in dreams.
And you don’t have to be clairvoyant, a prophet, or a King realize that there’s
something missing from society.
Cause they never completely
freed the neuce
just loosen it.
And so,
we are still getting auctioned
and assassinated
on a podium as we scream…
BLACK LIVES MATTER!
We are still campaigning our values
now through
hashtags and banners.
First God gave us our freedom
then man negotiated our freedom through amendments and constitutions.
And now we’re back
to running for our freedom.
He ran because his rights
came to the end of its life cycle.
He ran because today is yesterday.
And the struggles with in
the circumference of racism
was suppose to reciprocate change
but hatred still have us in the range…
being a target.
And so he ran.
Not because of a movement.
But because his movement was a
reenactment of history.
Do you think that death benefits
from social security
is enough to compensate
a child’s pain?
Because there is no one else
paying for these “mistakes”.
C’mon,
is grace AND justice
waiting for us
at the gates of heaven?
And why…
why we should die
to see them.
He ran…
he ran TOWARDS freedom.
Because just maybe…
just maybe,
he felt that
there was life after death.

Pictures of Aunty

Posted: March 26, 2015 in Uncategorized

(This poem was originally written as a tribute to my Grandfather, called “Pictures of Poppa”. This version is dedicated to my Aunt, Marie Slue. ) 

I have these pictures

like they

give me forever.

Easily

mapping out history

through moments

and laughter.

Perfect in distance

and when time alters

our memory.

I hold

pictures of you.

Plastered like murals

in my traditions.

They glow silver

for wisdom.

They are truthful

and give me

an identity.

Passed off to my children

that strengthens generations.

They comfort me

in your absence.

And this is why

I

have the best of you….

forever

A picture.

Hung in my heart

like how the heavens

hover over the earth.

With this

I will never

have to search

for your existence.

I will have your presence

exile in my memory.

Simply still

and ageless.

Framed eternal

in places too precious

to rely on stories alone.

Crowned sacred

by the Griots of history.

You

are my picture.

Preciously

painted

purple.

Posed

in a

place

of

posterity.

Emotionally pixelated

to each smile in time.

I’ve

organized theses pictures

like organs.

As a rebuttal

to my remembrance.

But when I

recap my relapse,

nothing is more

organic than

God.